The Inclination Evaluation
by CatGal15
Summary: The friends try to give up one bad habit for the duration of a week. Sheldon helps Amy cope with crisis. Please R&R.
1. Chapter 1

"Phone, nothing. Voice mail, nothing. Email, nothing. Text, nothing. Facebook, nothing!" Sheldon sounded ready to throw his phone across the room. "I'm telling you, she regrets saying yes. She's avoiding me."

"You don't know that," Bernadette tried to soothe him.

"Not for a fact, but I'm pretty sure! What else could it be?"

Bernadette patted his hand. "Go to her," she coaxed.

"Will you take me?"

"Sheldon, I couldn't fit behind the wheel."

"Well, that's unfortunate. Because I tried calling Penny, and she's drunk; I tried calling Howard, and he's busy; I tried calling Raj, but he's in the office; and Leonard has to drive Penny home." Sheldon sighed and pocketed his phone. "I guess I'll just...walk there. Would you come with me?"

"I would, but you were impatient when I crossed a little room. Imagine a twenty-minute walk."

"Good point."

"I'm sorry, Sheldon. Tell you what; come back here for dinner and I'll ask Cecile to help me make all your favorites."

Sheldon tried to smile. "Thanks."

When he let himself out a few moments later, he found himself running down the street.

-0-0-0-0-

When Sheldon reached Amy's apartment building, he stopped and looked up at her window. The shades were drawn. Without another thought in his head Sheldon let himself into the building and followed the familiar path to her door.

He came to a dead stop when he heard her soft cries. When they faded he raised his hand to knock - but the crash of glass hitting the door had him jerking back. Then it was silent.

He knocked.

"Oh, go away," Amy called miserably.

"Amy, I'm standing out here panicking. I ran all this way; can you at least tell me what's wrong?"

Amy hesitated. "Hang on."

When she opened the door she was still holding the broom in her hand. She looked like his old Amy again; except her uncombed hair appeared unwashed and her eyes were rimmed in red.

"What happened?" Sheldon asked.

Amy closed her eyes on a fresh tide of pain. "I went to the doctor."

Sheldon's heart skipped a beat. "Oh God. It's a tumor. It's cancer. It's leukemia."

"No, none of those!"

"Then why on earth did you cause me such an emotional upheaval?"

Amy set her broom aside. "I'm crying because I'm heartbroken, Sheldon."

"Again?"

Amy bit her lip. "I went to the doctor to see if...if I was ready to have a baby, and...I am not able to conceive."

Sheldon felt a small measure of relief. "Why not?"

"My tilted uterus...damaged me inside," she said brokenly. "My tissue is diseased."

"Isn't there a cure?"

"Yes, but...there's always the chance that the baby will be affected."

Sheldon gently tucked her hair behind her ear, and pulled her into a soft hug.

"I just want to go to bed and forget I lived this day," Amy murmured against his chest.

"Want me to stay? I can keep the place clean, bring food to you..."

"No, I just need to be alone."

Sheldon released her like a virus and stepped back into the hallway, and she closed the door in his face. Looking lost and clueless, Sheldon turned and slowly roamed back the way he came. 


	2. Chapter 2

"You know, I judged Priya too hard," Penny said, as Leonard helped her stagger up the stairwell. "She's a lotta fun. At least she is now that she's married a pizza girl."

Leonard grimaced when Penny didn't lift her foot high enough, causing them both to wobble.

"Has there always been like a gazillion stairs?" Penny asked.

"No, just thirty-nine."

"That's like, more than a gazillion!"

Leonard tried not to telegraph his disappointment in her. "You drink too much," he stated blandly.

"I do not! I don't drink enough."

"Penny, my mom is a therapist. She associated me with a whole bunch of problems. I think I can recognize a dependency when I see one. You are an alcoholic."

"Lick. Lick. That's a fun word. Kinda splashes."

"Only when you drool." Reaching the top of the final flight, he took her arm off his neck. "I mean it; you couldn't live a day without some sort of alcoholic beverage."

"Could, too!" Penny tottered again.

"I'd love to see you try."

"Fine! Fine, but two can play at this game. If I can't wine any drink, then you can't play nerd games, talk about nerd movies, or go to the comic book store. One week!"

"Deal." They shook hands and Penny swayed.

"Um okay, Um okay," she tried to assure him.

"Yeah...Go to bed." He began to steer her toward her apartment.

"Leonard! I can by walk myself."

"Fine." He let her go and she bumped into the door as she tried to insert her key backwards.

"Why'd'ja let go?" she slurred, ineffectively poking the key against the lock.

-0-0-0-0-

"And you can't even come with us to the comic book store?" Raj asked.

"Nope."

"And you agreed to this willingly?" Howard asked.

"There's more to life than a bunch of comic books!"

Raj considered and shook his head. "Not my life."

"Then that's exactly why you should try to give it up," Leonard told him.

"Seriously?"

"It's just for a week," Leonard said. "Aren't you strong enough?"

Raj tried to blow it off with a short laugh, but then he said, "I'm strong enough. Screw it, I'm in."

"Good! You and me, no comic books, no comic book characters incorporated into movies. Howard, you in?"

"I really don't think a sack of sorry magazines is challenging enough for me," Howard answered.

"Good point," Raj said, "You should give up humor. For a week."

Howard was nonresponsive, but his eye twitched.

Leonard smiled and looked at Sheldon. "What about you, Sheldon, are you up to the challenge?"

Sheldon didn't answer; he silently continued to toy with his food.

"Sheldon? Did one of your circuits short out?" Howard asked, and Sheldon looked up. "We're talking to you."

"Just because I didn't answer, doesn't mean I didn't hear you," Sheldon answered.

"So you're just not interested, then," Raj guessed.

"Not at all. I have real things to think about, gentlemen...Perhaps if you tried to live in the real world, you could relate." Sheldon set his plate down with a clatter, stood and abandoned his Spot. 


	3. Chapter 3

"Giving up so early?" Leonard asked, as Penny poured herself a glass of wine.

"Giving what up?"

Leonard explained, "Last night we made a wager that you couldn't last a week without alcohol."

"Sure I can," Penny answered, her voice cracking with uncertainty.

Leonard moved to her side of the island. "So you wouldn't mind if I...poured it all down the drain?"

"Of course I would; I paid good money for it, and a week doesn't last forever."

"Well, you could always forfeit the challenge and prove yourself an alcoholic."

Penny considered. "Is there a prize for winning?"

"Yes. And there are a bevy of consequences for losing."

"Really? What?"

"Well, you wouldn't get the reward. You'd be called a loser. And in your case, there might even be an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting in order."

Penny squinted. "And if I win, I wouldn't have to go to AA."

"With Sheldon," Leonard added.

Penny paused, considering. "Aw, I make good money; pour that sucker away."

Leonard picked up the bottle of booze, uncapped it, and poured it down the drain, shaking out the last droplets.

"You realize that when I beat your ass, and don't have to go to a single meeting - "

"Oh, Penny." Leonard smiled. "You won't beat me."

Penny put her hand on her hip. "Maybe not at the challenge."

Leonard averted his eyes.

Then the apartment door blew open and Sheldon lurched in. "Bernadette's in labor."

Penny grabbed her purse and Leonard followed them out, locking up 4B; and the trio hurried down the stairs. "I just got a sense of deja vu!" Leonard said.

-0-0-0-0-

Bernadette was red-faced and doing a deep breathing exercise when they got there. She sat in a wheelchair, holding Howard's hand. Amy sat next to him, completely stone-faced.

Looking up she smiled. "Hi, guys," she panted.

A nurse came and grabbed the wheelchair, and began to push it toward the hall. " 'Bye, guys!" Bernadette trilled.

Penny walked a few steps after them, then stopped and looked at Sheldon and Leonard. Sheldon was looking at Amy, who appeared oblivious to the world around her. Leonard gave Sheldon a push toward her.

Sheldon approached Amy and sat next to her. "Amy?"

She didn't respond. She didn't even look at him.

A white blur in his peripheral vision made Sheldon look down. "What happened to your foot?" he asked.

"I stepped in glass." Still she wouldn't look at him. "Cut through a vein, bled all over the place. My own damn fault."

Sheldon tried to relax in his seat, watching Leonard and Penny talking quietly in the corner. Looking back at Amy, who was totally ignoring him again, he said, "Are we still together?"

"Why wouldn't we be?"

"Well, I kind of have this sense that you're mad at me. And I don't know why, if you are."

"I'm not mad at you. I'm just overwhelmed with a crushing sense of loss." She looked impassively at him. "My friend is having a baby. And I can't even share in her joy."

"But, we're still together?"

"Yes, Sheldon, we're still together. For God's sake, we're engaged. Why are you fixated on that?"

"Because you said if you weren't pregnant by the time Bernadette had kids, you'd leave me."

"A.), I was drunk out of my skull; and B.), even if I did leave you, I couldn't have kids with someone else. It doesn't matter what I do or where I go."

Sheldon placed his hand on hers. "Get the cure."

"Why? So I can bring into this world a person with some kind of disability, to be teased and mocked until that child has no self-esteem and curses me for having a kid?"

"Wouldn't you still love said kid?"

"Of course I would! But I would want 'said kid' to have a better life."

Sheldon sat back in his seat, his hand still on hers. "Well, there are plenty of kids at the adoption centre who want a better life."

Amy looked at him.

"If you took one home, at least he or she would have two parents," he continued.

Emotion passed suddenly through her eyes. "Really? You'd raise a kid with me?"

"Amy..." He turned to look at her. "Having kids is your dream."

She nodded.

"Well, you're mine."

Her eyes filled with tears, and she raised his hand to her lips.

"So is that a yes?" Sheldon asked.

She nodded.

" 'Kay. One question; should it be a boy or a girl?"

Amy searched his eyes. "Are you open to adopting more than one?"

Sheldon didn't have to consider long. "I want what you want."

She raised her brows.

He shrugged. "What would really be different? I'm teaching everyone everything all the time."

Amy nodded and bit back the response that everything he did and loved was already perfectly compatible with what a child would do and love. Instead she stood, pulling him with her. "Come on. Let's go tell our friends we're adopting children."

He squeezed her hand, smiling cordially and walking by her side to where Leonard and Penny stood. As they neared, the front door blew open and Raj walked quickly in. "Did I miss it?"

"No, she's in the delivery room now," Leonard told him.

"Oh, crap, I'm missing it!" Raj exclaimed, and hurried to the front desk. 


	4. Chapter 4

"So, uh, two quick bombshells," Amy said. She looked at Sheldon. "We each do one?"

"Agreed. You first."

Amy looked back at Leonard and Penny. "We're engaged," she said, and showed them the ring. "Look, proof!"

"Congratulations!" Penny exclaimed.

"Finally," Leonard added.

"Look who's talking," Sheldon told him, instantly quieting him.

"What's the other bombshell?" Penny asked.

"We're going to adopt children," Sheldon answered.

Leonard and Penny stared, silently. Finally Penny asked, "What?"

"Well, as it turns out I can't have children of my own," Amy informed them. "This is the only option, and my only chance at being a mom."

Penny looked remorsefully at Leonard. "Sorry, Amy. That's terrific; I am so happy for you guys."

"Yes, congratulations," Leonard added. "I never would've thought you'd start a family before Penny and me."

Sheldon smirked. "Newsflash; the only thing you've agreed to do together lately is the battle of willpower."

"What?" Amy asked.

"It's this stupid little challenge Leonard came up with," Penny told her. "I can't drink wine, he and Raj can't read, watch or talk about comic book characters; and Howard can't make any jokes."

"May I join?" Amy asked.

"Of course! Let's see," Penny said brightly. "What, oh what, could Amy give up?"

A silence followed.

Finally, Leonard offered, "Well, I know what Sheldon could give up."

"Yeah?" Penny asked.

"Insulting people."

Sheldon looked at him, frustrated. "Leonard, could you stop being stupid for like two seconds? I don't do that."

"Hah!" Amy exclaimed.

"You just did!" Leonard told him.

"When?!"

"You called me stupid."

"That wasn't offensive! That was an expression of gratitude," Sheldon defended. "Leonard, you may not know it, and given your Princeton-based educational background it's more than likely, but people like Penny rely on you to appear more intelligent, you know? I was merely acknowledging both your existence and the responsibilities you tote around on a daily basis."

"Gee, thanks."

Sheldon patted his arm.

"We all tote around one responsibility in common; it's called being Sheldon Cooper's friend," Penny told Sheldon.

A door opened and a security guard walked by pushing Raj, who was yelling, "This isn't my fault! This isn't my fault; I'm a good friend! I'll find my way back inside, you'll see! I promise you all, you'll see!"

The guard pushed him outside and closed the doors. Then he put his hands on his hips and remained standing right in front of the entrance.

Sheldon looked down at Amy. "That's humorous, correct?"

"No!" Amy said vehemently, and she walked past the guard and let herself out.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah," Raj answered. "He didn't hurt me. Well, he did, but I'm soft; it wasn't on purpose."

"Good. I'm glad. So what did you do to get thrown out?" Amy inquired.

"I was trying to film the birth. But apparently that's not allowed!"

Amy tried not to roll her eyes or berate him.

He snapped his fingers. "Oh, I know! This is a hospital; I'll fake severe injury. They can't refuse me then!"

Amy let her eyes roll. "And what, you think they're going to put you in the same room as Bernadette?"

"Well, I...did. Up until you said it and made it sound ridiculous." Raj began to walk.

"Where are you going?"

"Just around the building; there might be a window I can get into somewhere. Maybe climb a tree like Herbert on Family Guy."

Amy shook her head and let herself back into the hospital. Wondering if she should or should not inform the security guard of Raj's plan, she smiled at him and returned to Leonard, Penny and Sheldon.

"So what should we get Raj for his birthday?" Leonard was asking.

Amy sat next to him. "A book explaining everything illegal or unethical might be nice." 


	5. Chapter 5

[2 hours later]

"Oh, they are so beautiful!" Penny gushed. "Even the one with three shoulders."

"Yeah," Howard agreed. "Look at their noses. That's all Rostenkowski. Thank goodness."

"I want to see, too!" Raj called, leaning in through the window.

Howard looked down at the unappreciative Bernadette. "Katie, look," Howard said, tilting up the single-headed sweetie. "It's your uncle Tarzan."

"Is that humor I hear?" Sheldon asked.

Howard shrugged it off. "Like I care about some dumb contest; I'm a father."

Sheldon looked in worry at Amy. "Will being a father mean I can't play as many games?"

"On the contrary," Leonard said, "It means you get to play more without seeming as weird."

"Suh-weet," Howard said, and Bernadette closed her eyes and sighed.

"Can I hold my niece?" Cecile asked, and Howard lovingly deposited his daughter into her arms. The Kodak moment was interrupted when a crack came from outside, and looking to the window they saw the bare branch shaking.

Penny, Leonard and Amy hurried to the window. "Raj!" Penny called, and he looked up. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," he called sadly.

"Are you injured or expecting surgery?" the guard demanded.

"No."

"Then I'm going to have to ask you to leave, before I call the police."

Raj stuffed his hands into his pockets. "My friend just had babies."

"I don't care if she spawned aliens. Off the premises."

Raj nodded, turned and dejectedly walked toward the exit.

-0-0-0-0-

"Look at them all," Amy crooned. They peered through a big window into a room filled with babies. "Look how tiny they are!"

"I know. It's hard to imagine they could grow up to be rock stars...scientists...Yet it's perfectly believable for them to become engineers."

Amy withdrew from the glass. "I don't want babies, Sheldon. I want kids."

"What about us?"

Sheldon and Amy turned to look at a boy and girl. He was a bit taller and they both had blond hair. His eyes were brown, hers were blue and they were dressed in extremely casual clothing.

"Oh, um, where are you from?" Amy asked.

"The orphanage."

A well-dressed man walked up behind them. "I told you not to speak to strangers if I'm not there. I thought you were smarter than that."

"Wait, wait, wait," Sheldon said, as the man began to herd the kids away. "How smart are they?"

"Y=MX+B," the girl said quickly.

Amy looked up at Sheldon, then back at the man. "Oh, we're interested."

"Yes, we want to take your kids," Sheldon added.

The man walked away, pulling the kids with him; and when Sheldon tried to follow him Amy put a hand in front of him.

"What are you doing? It's interview time," Sheldon said importantly.

Amy sighed. "You just failed your class." 


	6. Chapter 6

AUTHOR'S NOTE: The sixth chapter has been replaced. I didn't really think the original version fit with the story, and negative reviews made me certain. I hope this adaptation is an improvement.

-0-0-0-0-

"I cannot believe Shamy got engaged," Penny said, as she and Leonard walked up the stairs.

"I can't believe they're out right now looking to adopt," Leonard muttered. "Those poor kids won't stand a chance." They climbed quietly for a moment, and then Leonard asked, "You ever think about having kids?"

In the silence that followed he felt the urge to add, "With me?"

"Every time we have sex," she answered bluntly. "That's why I take the pill."

"So you don't want kids."

"The timing's not right. I'm a pharmaceutical sales rep, you're a scientist - "

"Yeah, we should really wait until we're out of work," Leonard answered.

"Well, neither of us can do our job if we're looking after a baby!"

"So we hire a nanny, like Howard and Bernadette. You know we could afford it."

"Yeah, well, we could also afford to move into a house with a free-to-use laundry room and maybe one flight of stairs; yet here we are!" Penny answered.

Leonard stopped in front of the elevator, looking quizzically at her. "You want to move?"

"Leonard, come on. Sheldon would still have a fiancee and a kid as roommates. There's no responsibility tying you down. Don't you think it's time you lived your life the way you want?"

Leonard was quiet for a moment. "I...never really thought about it. I've never had this much freedom before. It's kind of overwhelming."

"Well, give it some thought." Penny unlocked her door and walked into the apartment, and Leonard slowly followed. "We could park in the garage, instead of in a parking lot; we could paint the walls; and Sheldon doesn't have to know our address!"

"That's true."

"We could have pets...bonfires...Play music as loud as we want." Penny sat on the couch. "This could be good for us. We're young enough, we make good money. If you want a baby, it's the first step."

"Plenty of people who have babies live in apartments."

"Yes, and none of those babies' mothers are named Penny."

"Why not?"

"I just don't want there to be any accidents!"

"What accidents?"

Penny stared at him and realized she couldn't ever have this conversation. So instead, she said, "You know why I don't like the X-Men? Wolverine's shirt heals. Like, what, is it some kind of magic material?"

Leonard stared intensely at her.

"What about Professor X? He's shot in the back as a young man and he's crippled, right, but in a different movie he's an old man and he's walking."

"Don't goad me into this conversation."

"Why not?"

"Because my only argument is that you SHOULD drink wine, and I really don't want you to do that." Leonard's voice began to rise, "Why do you feel the need to drink so much anyway? Am I so horrible to be around when you're sober?"

"No, sweetie, of course not. You're thinking of Sheldon."

"He's not here half the time you drink! He wasn't at the restaurant, he wasn't at at dinner, he wasn't at the movies or my mom's lecture..."

"So I drink! Big deal. Maybe I just need to be drunk to face people like Sheldon or your mom. You know, they're kind of...bitter, and boring, and impassive. But once I grow a wine spine, I'm good to go!"

"A wine spine."

"Yeah! You know, a sense of bravery until the hangover passes. Honestly, I'm surprised you don't drink more."

Leonard stared at her.

She tilted her head and looked at him askance. "What's wrong? I said it's not you; didn't you hear me?"

Leonard didn't look satisfied. "My wife can't stand my friends," he said. "I never thought I'd be this guy."

"You've been that guy since Day One! Leonard, sweetie, I've been drinking a loooong time. Let me put it to you this way; I was drinking before my first date. Your friends didn't cause my drinking, they just...made me drink more."

"Well, that's good to know," Leonard said sarcastically.

"You want to know what I'm hoping for?"

"What?"

"I'm hoping we move into a house, and Sheldon and Amy adopt and adopt and adopt until there's no more Sheldon left. You know? He'll have all this responsibility, and he'll finally know how we felt all these years, and he'll change."

Leonard sighed and sat next to her. "You know, the last time you wished you could get a break from Sheldon, it came true."

Penny nodded.

"You know, fate clearly likes you. Make a wish that I get taller," Leonard requested, and she grinned. 


	7. Chapter 7

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I don't have cable TV. I haven't for a long time now, and I just caught up on season 10 tonight. I didn't realize how similar my stories were to the show itself. So, I'm sorry. I understand it if you think this story is a waste of time. I kind of feel that way myself. But I started it - so I must finish it.

-0-0-0-0-

"Okay, Danielle Robinson," Sheldon said smugly. "Try...six hundred divided by seventeen, multiply the remainder by one thousand."

The cute brunette child briefly considered. "The remainder is thirty five thousand two hundred ninety-four point one million one hundred seventy-six thousand four hundred seventy one."

Sheldon and Amy looked impressed.

"Yes. Good, Danielle. Now, remember, Mr. Cooper...I'm interviewing you," the agent reminded them.

Sheldon's response was instant, although stiff and formal. "Dr. Cooper."

The agent raised her brows. "Really! So that's why you're so fixated on mathematics. Well, now we're getting somewhere. And you are...?" she asked Amy.

"Dr. Fowler. We're engaged," she explained.

"Congratulations. Now do you have pets?"

Amy locked eyes with her. "I am occasionally allowed to bring home a monkey from the lab, but they're never permanently in my care."

"I see. Now do either of you smoke?"

"No, but Ricky the capuchin does. Don't worry, he's very responsible."

"I see," the agent answered haltingly. "Dr. Cooper, do you smoke?"

"No, ma'am."

The agent scribbled something on her clipboard paper, and Amy took the time to size Danielle up. She was dressed in denim overalls, with a pink T-shirt underneath. Her long hair hung limply over her thin shoulders, and her eyes were barely discernible from beneath the thick veil of long, uneven bangs. She mostly looked down at her oversized socks.

"I'm supposed to ask if you could afford to put the child, or children, you adopt through schooling; but based on your self-acclaimed doctoral degrees, I may not have to. I also recognize you from a conference," the agent told Sheldon.

He smiled and nodded cordially.

"I must say, even when you angered the physicist and he hit you, you never hit back, and that shows good ethics. I like it." The agent leaned forward. "Now...Dr. Cooper, Dr. Fowler. How do you resolve conflict?"

Amy and Sheldon exchanged a faltering glance.

-0-0-0-0-

"Hey, Bernadette, how are you feeling?" Leonard asked.

Bernadette's shrill voice came through over his phone's loudspeaker. "I'm fantastic. My babies are fantastic, and so adorable, and I love them with all my heart."

"Good. Glad to hear it," Leonard told her. "Listen...we need help from you and Howard."

"Sure, anything."

"What's the rent like up there?"

Bernadette was quiet for a moment. "Uh...twelve hundred and up, I guess. This house is fourteen. Why? Are you thinking of moving?"

"Yeah, into a house big enough to raise kids," he informed her.

Penny looked up from the sandwich she was making.

"Really?"

"Yeah, what with you giving birth and Sheldon and Amy adopting, we kind of got baby fever."

"And poor Raj is alone forever!" Raj's voice floated through the loudspeaker.

"I told you, make a date with Cecile. She really likes you; strap on a pair!" Bernadette hissed.

"I don't know. She looks a lot like you, it might be awkward."

"Raj...I'm short. She's tall. I've got blue eyes and she's got brown. Not even you can confuse us."

"...Okay."

Bernadette sighed and then her voice came on louder. "Leonard, I know we're not exactly close. I feel left out a lot of the time. I don't really know you, or Raj...or Sheldon. I'm just one of the girls, just Howard's wife. But having a baby with Penny would be a mistake."

Penny's brows rose in surprise.

"Wh-whatever makes you think that?" Leonard stammered, looking nervously at his wife.

"Are you kidding? She's trying not to drink wine for a week, and she's barely hangin' on. If she couldn't last nine months, she'd harm the baby. I love Penny like a sister, you know that. But pregnancy is just not the way to go with you guys."

"I can hear you," Penny finally said.

The response was soft. "I know, Leonard told me I was on loudspeaker. I hope you know how much I care about you, Penny...But trust me."

Penny slowly put down the knife.

"I have to go," Bernadette said quietly. "Raj wrote me a note and he's waving it in my face."

Then, with a click, she was gone.

-0-0-0-0-

Bernadette lowered the phone, reading the note.

"It's a little late not to tell them, dumbass."

"Hey, hey! No swearing in front of the babies," Raj said, motioning subtly to the crib. 


	8. Chapter 8

(Later that week)

"I can't take this anymore!" Leonard shouted, as he exploded into the apartment. "I'm a nerd, Penny; it's who I am. So I'm going to Batman, Superman, Spiderman, Hulk, Bane, and Johnny Ohm the hell out of you tonight. Okay? I forfeit." He dropped his shopping bags on the couch.

"Great," Penny chirped. "I am going to go see how Sheldon's doing." She let herself out and walked across the hall, knocking on the door.

"Come in," Amy called.

Penny let herself in. Amy and Sheldon were snuggled up the couch watching TV. "Aw, well aren't you cute!" Penny noted. "Whatcha watchin'?"

"The Avengers," Sheldon said.

"Thank God," Leonard said, squeezing in past Penny. "The healing begins."

Penny smiled at him. "Uh, Leonard, you never answered - "

"Hang on, hang on!" Sheldon commanded. "Talk quietly in the kitchen before I have to rewind the whole movie." He began to rewind, Amy clung to him without objection, and Penny and Leonard walked to the kitchen.

"Now that you can nerdify yourself again, you never answered me about Wolverine's shirt," Penny continued.

"Nerd-if-y?" Leonard enunciated.

"Nerdize? Geekize? Geek up? Dorkify? I don't know, you pick one."

Leonard shrugged. "Dorkify kinda has a ring to it."

"Really?" Penny asked sarcastically.

Leonard began to browse the fridge. "Well, Wolverine's shirt is nothing but a mistake. So is Professor Xavier's walking as an old man. I love the franchise, but they're not perfect."

"Nothing you love is perfect!" Sheldon called over the volume of the movie.

At the same time Leonard and Penny both mocked his laugh. While Sheldon looked at them as if they were crazy, Amy paused the movie so she could answer her ringing phone in peace. "Hello?" She listened for a moment. "Oh," she said quietly. "Okay, thank you for calling. ...Tomorrow is fine. ...'Bye."

She hung up and looked at Sheldon. Her fingers trembled and her voice shook only slightly, "We...we were approved, we're parents."

Sheldon slowly pulled himself into a sitting position. "You don't sound as thrilled as I thought you'd be."

"I guess I'm just...nervous." Amy looked slowly around the apartment. "I suppose I could take the couch. We need to buy more tape, and some toys...Some housewarming candy."

"First of all," Sheldon said strongly, "Nobody is sleeping on this couch. First thing in the morning I want my Spot empty for breakfast with Dr. Who."

"Then, where will I sleep?"

"With me, of course. We'll make it work. I can use my savings for Danielle's wardrobe."

"All of it?" Amy asked.

"Yes."

Amy bit her lip. "Alright. I suppose I can manage the money well enough to buy the toys, tape, candy, and Erica's wardrobe."

Sheldon looked at her with raised brows. "Erica's wardrobe?"

Amy nodded. "Danielle and Erica Miller."

"Oh, dear Lord." Sheldon sat quietly for a moment, then picked up the phone.

"What - you're not backing out on me, are you?" Amy asked.

"No! I'm calling my mom and my meemaw. Oh, and Missy! They need to come see our children! Dear God, I need to hide my action figures!" Sheldon ran down the hall, carrying his phone with him.

Amy grinned at Leonard and Penny, one hand over her pounding heart.

"Congratulations! I'm so happy for you!" Leonard exclaimed, moving around the table. "Can we meet them?"

"After they've eaten, I guess," Amy answered.

"How old are they?"

"Uh, I think they were eleven and thirteen," Amy answered. Finally it sank in that tomorrow, she would be a parent; and she hugged Leonard. "I'm a mom!" She moved to Penny, stopping when she saw her. She was leaning over the kitchen island, staring off into space. "Penny?"

-0-0-0-0-

(Penny's daydream)

"Okay! Gang's all here!" Howard called, as he, Bernadette and their triplets paraded upstairs.

"I'll order pizza!" Bernadette trilled, moving toward the apartment.

"No, no, no, I already ordered Chinese," Sheldon answered.

"What? I just busted my ass makin' dinner!" Penny told him.

Howard's brows rose. "Girls, go into the apartment," he told his daughters, and they obeyed. In their silence he moved closer, aggressively, toward Penny. "You can't say 'ass' around my kids! Say 'tuchus'."

"Okay, how's this? Tell me what to do and I'll lay a whoopin' on your uptight tuchus."

Howard looked at Raj and looked back at her. "Wow, you are bitter," he chuckled, "Maybe it's a good thing you never had kids!"

-0-0-0-0-

(Reality)

"Penny?" Amy asked again.

Penny blinked and looked at her. "Oh, yes. Congratulations."

"Are you okay?" Sheldon asked.

"I'm fine, sweetie, I'm just...tired. I think I'll go to bed. 'Night, guys, enjoy the movie." Penny dejectedly left the suite.

Amy looked at the guys. "How come she never calls me sweetie?" she asked. "I'm part of this group, right?"

"I can call you sweetie," Leonard joked.

"Don't you dare," Sheldon said quickly.

Amy hooked her arm around his waist. "Yeah, I'm spoken for. Besides," she added, "No offense, but it wouldn't be the same." 


	9. Chapter 9

(The following day)

"Home sweet home," Amy said, opening the car door for the girls.

Danielle and Erica got out of the car. Danielle wore a baggy pink sweater and faded, ragged jeans. Her hair was in pigtails again. Her sister kept her brown hair short, and she wore an orange sundress and lime green leggings, and she held an old stuffed toy dog.

"An apartment?" Erica asked.

Clearly Danielle is the smart one, Sheldon thought. All he said was yes, but he rolled his eyes at Amy, who kept him silent with a subtle shake of her head. As a group they walked through the parking lot toward Los Robles. "Our apartment is three stories up," Amy began the tour. "The elevator is broken, like I said." She walked through the front door Sheldon held open, and they paused at the sight of construction men, one of whom was prying the elevator door open. "Hopefully it won't be for long," Amy added, and began to walk upstairs. Danielle and Erica followed.

Sheldon stepped into the apartment, letting the door swing closed. "What the hell took you guys so long?" he asked.

"Sheldon," Amy called, and shaking his head he began to climb the stairwell.

Moments later Amy reached the third floor and turned left, letting herself into 4A. Danielle and Erica followed. "You know, you might be able to see better if you took your hair from your eyes," Amy pointed out, and Danielle lifted her head, looking around the apartment with beautiful, blinky hazel eyes.

Amy looked excitedly at Sheldon, who smiled calmly as he shut the door.

"Is anybody hungry?" Amy asked.

"No, ma'am," Danielle and Erica both said.

"Call me Mom, it's okay."

Danielle and Erica looked at one another before moving further into the apartment.

"I'll give you a tour and then you can make yourselves at home," Sheldon said, and he moved down the hall. Amy sat on the couch and smiled, feeling overwhelmed with happiness.

Soon Sheldon walked back into the living room. "They're looking out the window playing I Spy," he informed her. "Apparently we have what they call a 'good view'."

Amy stood and kissed him, and he kissed her back. Pulling back, he held her and said, "Should we pick a wedding date?"

She sighed happily and just held him.

"I think this'll be my Spot!" a youthful voice exclaimed, and Sheldon and Amy broke apart and looked at Erica, who sat in Sheldon's spot. She grinned up at him even as his face began to twitch.

-0-0-0-0-

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I think I've reached a good stopping point. By the way, the winner of the challenge was Raj, and the reward was the royal treatment; the friends had to do whatever he wanted for 24 hours. You can bet he would have thrown murder mystery parties like crazy. Penny has to go to AA meetings with Sheldon, and Leonard is happily indulging in comic books and Marvel movies. The Cooper kids got to see Kate and "Siamese" Wolowitz, whom I named Kristy and Karina. They want to be mommies already. Where does the time go? 


End file.
